It's a bird, it's a plane …
The new UAV is the coolest thing since sliced bread
By: Editorial Board
Issue date: 10/22/07 Section: Opinion
You've gotta keep up with the acronyms: UAV is the new UFO, and the U.S. and British militaries might be putting it to use.
UAV stands for unmanned aerial vehicle. Developed by GFS Projects in England, it looks eerily like the unidentified flying objects of yore.
Weighing in at just 15 pounds and a measly two feet across, the UAV can travel about 40 mph over any terrain, and if it hits an obstacle, it just bounces off.
We are excited at the possible advantage such an invention surely will provide to the U.S. and British militaries.
The UAV is piloted by remote control radio signals and, researchers hope, eventually autonomously by GPS. Without a human pilot inside, that means no more U-2 spy planes being shot down over Russia and pilots being captured.
Its functioning was described as resembling a woman's skirt: A propeller atop the aircraft pushes air down around the saucer-shaped UAV's body, creating a large base of air extending downward and outward that keeps the craft airborne.
It's simple, yet effective. If only all things could be as such.
The price only makes the thing even cooler. Production costs would be in the low thousands of pounds - far less than, say, a spy helicopter - although because of the rather dismal exchange rate, it would be almost twice as much in U.S. dollars.
The only real problem we see with the UAV is that American foreign relations might take a hit. After all, we don't imagine other countries - including, but most certainly not limited to, North Korea, Iran, Cuba and Russia - would appreciate being spied on continuously.
But the good news is that with the UAV, we can spy on them clandestinely, so they probably won't ever find out about it.
The UAV also can be used for civil activities such as search and rescue.
The creation of such a versatile piece of equipment just goes to illustrate the value of innovation. Innovation, however, deserves a much cooler name. We recommend the Uber-Sweet Spy Reconnaissance (USSR) Satellite.
UAV stands for unmanned aerial vehicle. Developed by GFS Projects in England, it looks eerily like the unidentified flying objects of yore.
Weighing in at just 15 pounds and a measly two feet across, the UAV can travel about 40 mph over any terrain, and if it hits an obstacle, it just bounces off.
We are excited at the possible advantage such an invention surely will provide to the U.S. and British militaries.
The UAV is piloted by remote control radio signals and, researchers hope, eventually autonomously by GPS. Without a human pilot inside, that means no more U-2 spy planes being shot down over Russia and pilots being captured.
Its functioning was described as resembling a woman's skirt: A propeller atop the aircraft pushes air down around the saucer-shaped UAV's body, creating a large base of air extending downward and outward that keeps the craft airborne.
It's simple, yet effective. If only all things could be as such.
The price only makes the thing even cooler. Production costs would be in the low thousands of pounds - far less than, say, a spy helicopter - although because of the rather dismal exchange rate, it would be almost twice as much in U.S. dollars.
The only real problem we see with the UAV is that American foreign relations might take a hit. After all, we don't imagine other countries - including, but most certainly not limited to, North Korea, Iran, Cuba and Russia - would appreciate being spied on continuously.
But the good news is that with the UAV, we can spy on them clandestinely, so they probably won't ever find out about it.
The UAV also can be used for civil activities such as search and rescue.
The creation of such a versatile piece of equipment just goes to illustrate the value of innovation. Innovation, however, deserves a much cooler name. We recommend the Uber-Sweet Spy Reconnaissance (USSR) Satellite.
Viewing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
Dangles Diddlydoobs
posted 10/22/07 @ 8:58 AM EST
I'm glad to see the DTH Editorial Board is using it's soap box to fetishize US military power. Yeah! Now we can kill poor people in developing countries from the comfort of our desk chair! You can even kill these people and play a game of online poker at the same time! Isn't progress great?
Isn't there something better that the DTH could opine about? Or did these machines (which have been around for years) get your collective dicks so hard that you just couldn't resist?
I guess it won't be long before the DTH endorses attacking Iran (we have to use these somewhere right?) and makes the case for permanent war. (Continued…)
Jane
posted 10/22/07 @ 12:00 PM EST
Oh great! Another nifty new way for Bush/Cheney etal to spy on American citizens.
Frank
posted 10/22/07 @ 2:58 PM EST
I especially like the new 45lb GBU glide-bombs the USAF models can carry; many more bangs per UAV mission load-out. (Hellfires were okay, but too expensive and you could only carry 4 per platform. (Continued…)
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